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      01-17-2011, 11:07 AM   #67
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Quote:
Originally Posted by quagmire View Post
No.

If the wife/husband want to do it on their own, fine. But, if they still want to see and hang out with their male/female friends, let them. A husband/wife should not try to force their SO to ditch their female/male friends. That's what I am basically trying to say.
Understandable. However, the husband (or in your case, long term boyfriend) should have known that the wife (or girlfriend) is at the movies with a "friend". It shouldn't be a big deal when the best friend brings it up because he should have known about it anyway. Right?
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      01-17-2011, 11:14 AM   #68
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Quote:
Originally Posted by choicez View Post
Understandable. However, the husband (or in your case, long term boyfriend) should have known that the wife (or girlfriend) is at the movies with a "friend". It shouldn't be a big deal when the best friend brings it up because he should have known about it anyway. Right?
I understand telling the husband/BF( and vice versa) about the meet up. That is showing respect, etc.

But, at the same time I wouldn't jump to, " She is cheating on him" by simply seeing the wife with another guy at the movies. But now that the OP has clarified what he saw( kissing), then I would hint towards it by saying, " I was at the movies and saw your wife there, but didn't see you. Were you in the bathroom or concession stand?". Or somewhere close to that. Have him bring up who and what they were doing together.
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      01-17-2011, 02:36 PM   #69
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I think the entire debate in this thread was sparked by the wording of the OP(and also what happened in my brain as a result).

Title says 'Best Friend's wife cheating'.....this is insanely 100000% different than 'best friend's wife at a movie with a guy'.
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      01-17-2011, 03:30 PM   #70
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too lazy to read the thread but...

take a picture

and make a new email that's from some other country

and email it to him

then you're not 'that guy' anymore
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      01-17-2011, 03:31 PM   #71
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Quote:
Originally Posted by texasmojo View Post
The wife or husband should instantly know not to "hang out" privately with the opposite sex the day they got married.
it depends

if they've been friends for years and years... it'd be weird to say 'you can't see him/her anymore'

shows lack of confidence in a way
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      01-17-2011, 04:09 PM   #72
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterSkiMask View Post
I would call my friend and ask him what movie he saw on xxx night, and tell him I was stuck in line and I saw (insert wifes name) come out of the bathroom and walk away with him (only saw him from the back).

That way you would not be a dick. If it was something he knew about it's fine, then you were not accusing his wife of anything. If it's something he needs to know about then he can ask some questions and draw his own conclusions.
HAha this is the ideal!
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      01-17-2011, 04:17 PM   #73
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I wouldn't say it directly -

I would hit him up and ask what he's doing right now, then maybe try to be Sherlock and find out if he knows where the wifey is.
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      01-17-2011, 04:20 PM   #74
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i just watched the dilemma last night. i have learned from the movie to tell your friend ASAP!!! lol
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      01-17-2011, 04:44 PM   #75
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Do your buddy a favor and stalk the two of them. Then you can assault the man. Problem solved.
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      01-17-2011, 05:02 PM   #76
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I would feel responsible to look out for my best friend. Even if it ultimately cost us our friendship, I believe that through our previous history, I would owe him the truth. What my friend makes of the information is up to him, but I wouldn't let him be ignorant. If I were in my best friend's shoes, I would want him to tell me, even if the news hurts me. You can't fix the problem/move on if you don't know a problem exists.

Anyways, OP said he saw his best friend's wife kiss another dude. You can easily investigate. If she were out of town, there would be records. Credit cards etc.

I think if you don't tell your best friend something that serious, you're really not worthy of the title 'best friend.' If I knew my best friend knew something and didn't tell me, I'd be as disappointed in him as my cheating girlfriend/wife. It would truly sadden me to find out my best friend doesn't have my back. And I don't think circumstance matters, unless she is forced, it was her choice. Either it happened or it didn't. It really is just a simple question. Did she cheat, yes or no?

Quote:
Originally Posted by escobar929 View Post
I would even walk up to them and say hi and act nonchallant and introduce myself to him and ask "are you her brother?"

but only if its a really close friend, if its some dude from my office, its not my business
i would consider doing this or taking a picture for proof. not sure i want to show my cards and have her know that I know.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TiAg335i View Post
if its an innocuous type of relationship then it shouldn't bother her husband if you tell him,

so that means that telling him certainly wouldn't hurt, it could only help
+10000000


One more thing to those that say 'don't meddle." What if she just banged someone with a STD? I remember a study that showed people who cheat, tend to do things they wouldn't do with their significant others. If my friend got an STD because of that, I would feel personally responsible because I didn't tell him.
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      01-17-2011, 05:08 PM   #77
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Best friend? Need to find a way to tell him but as a best friend you must. If you are too much of a pussy to get in the middle then you are not much of a friend, not to mention a man.
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      01-17-2011, 05:14 PM   #78
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All I gota say is...



*"All" is a term used loosely, more of a 90% sort of deal, sisters, moms, current faithful wives, girlfriends are exempt. Unless of course they are...well, lets just not go there.*
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      01-17-2011, 06:23 PM   #79
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dude tell him asap , dont let him look like a fool
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      01-17-2011, 06:52 PM   #80
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NycE93M3 View Post
dude tell him asap , dont let him look like a fool
Sometimes thats not good. Because some guys take it the wrong way in that path. For example, its better to see her cheating then some other person telling him cause then teh guy has to make a judgment call absed off a rumor that he hasnt seen. Do you realize how hard it is to move and live like that?

Its better to see somthn in person and KNOW 100% whats going on. People will sleep better at night.
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      01-17-2011, 07:29 PM   #81
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Screw it, just call cheaters and lets watch the confrontation.
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      01-17-2011, 07:37 PM   #82
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Why does a girl needs male friends or guy needs female friends? Reality check...most of the time when a guy is friend with a girl it's because he failed or something was on before.....

Back to the topic I make my way to them introduce myself. Then call my friend and let him know what's going on. I'm not a snitch kind of guy but that's going a little to far by standing there and maybe being part of the lie. At least like that even if it's a false alarm my friend will know that I got his back.....However I would cover up my friend if he's cheating on his wife....I'm friend with my friend not the wife...if they break-split-divorce well too bad I'll probably never see her again but my friend will remain my friend.
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      01-17-2011, 07:39 PM   #83
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Back when i was 20 or 21 I member my BEST friends gf went to a club however told my friend she was out bowling with gfs. Her gf and my gf were sisters and I accidently found out when she called my gf and i heard the crazy music in the backround. I asked where was she and she said bowling, and it caused a HUGE fight between us because I knew she was lying trying to back up her sister. My gf eventually told me that night. This simply made me lose respect for the both of them especially my gf for lying to me. Im not saying anything happened or whatever but it was pure shadiness. My relationship was over shortly after

I really tried my best to be quiet and hope I can control it, thinking ya were young shit happens. However, NO WAY IN HELL WAS THIS POSSIBLE. After one day seeing him for 10 minutes I told him. Obviously he believed me because weve been buds forever. Caused major drama but he thanked me so much for being a true friend. I would expect the same gesture by him/or any other close friend of mine. Its not a big deal we were young but its the principal of brotherhood. Go figure, this bitch cheated on my friend shortly after lol.

Dont be a LITTLE BITCH, if your friends wifes friends saw him cheating he would probably have everything robbed from him.

You need to tell him, and if he causes drama with you then fuck him, youve done your part.
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      01-17-2011, 08:45 PM   #84
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You take pictures of the two together, then ask her for money to keep the secret.... Just kidding. Others hit it. In casual conversation (best if she is there too) just mention, "I saw you at the theater the other night. Was that your brother? Or your lover?" (Maybe leave out the last question.)
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      01-18-2011, 02:52 AM   #85
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Quote:
Originally Posted by quagmire View Post
I went with the movies with my friend while she was in a relationship( together for 3 years) plenty of times. Do you think that was cheating since nothing went on besides watching the movie?
Wow, you are living by a strict definition of "cheating". As long as there's no physical contact, you can do whatever you want. Go to movies, dinners, shopping and any other dates.
As long as your girlfriend comes home with you, she can mindfuck some other dude and cheat emotionally; but there's no physical intimacy- it was only a movie date so it's not really cheating? WOW
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      01-18-2011, 07:52 AM   #86
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AiyahPK View Post
Wow, you are living by a strict definition of "cheating". As long as there's no physical contact, you can do whatever you want. Go to movies, dinners, shopping and any other dates.
As long as your girlfriend comes home with you, she can mindfuck some other dude and cheat emotionally; but there's no physical intimacy- it was only a movie date so it's not really cheating? WOW
Wow, you're possessive. Can't go watch Transformers 2( not really a romantic movie is it?), can't grab something to eat, can't even shop for clothes( clothes were pants and shirts), etc.

What as a guy friend to a woman am I allowed to do in your opinion? There are limits for me as well. I would have an issue if it was a romantic movie, if the dinner was a candle lit dinner, etc, and if the clothes they were getting was lingerie. But, an innocent movie such as Transformers 2 bothers you?

Last edited by quagmire; 01-18-2011 at 09:45 AM..
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      01-18-2011, 09:58 AM   #87
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Quote:
Originally Posted by quagmire View Post
Wow, you're possessive. Can't go watch Transformers 2( not really a romantic movie is it?), can't grab something to eat, can't even shop for clothes( clothes were pants and shirts), etc.

What as a guy friend to a woman am I allowed to do in your opinion? There are limits for me as well. I would have an issue if it was a romantic movie, if the dinner was a candle lit dinner, etc, and if the clothes they were getting was lingerie. But, an innocent movie such as Transformers 2 bothers you?
Your too liberal. Your allowed to do whatever you want to a women. But to a married woman you back off and respect that marriage.
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      01-18-2011, 10:19 AM   #88
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Quote:
Originally Posted by quagmire View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by AiyahPK View Post
Wow, you are living by a strict definition of "cheating". As long as there's no physical contact, you can do whatever you want. Go to movies, dinners, shopping and any other dates.
As long as your girlfriend comes home with you, she can mindfuck some other dude and cheat emotionally; but there's no physical intimacy- it was only a movie date so it's not really cheating? WOW
Wow, you're possessive. Can't go watch Transformers 2( not really a romantic movie is it?), can't grab something to eat, can't even shop for clothes( clothes were pants and shirts), etc.

What as a guy friend to a woman am I allowed to do in your opinion? There are limits for me as well. I would have an issue if it was a romantic movie, if the dinner was a candle lit dinner, etc, and if the clothes they were getting was lingerie. But, an innocent movie such as Transformers 2 bothers you?
Yeah because both parties should know better than to be doing alone time dates if either is in a relationship, even if it is "innocent". IMO it's a total creeper move. Nothing wrong when single but a relationship should be respected.
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