Quote:
Originally Posted by King Rudi
Thanks man! I appreciate that. This is the exact thing we discussed last Friday night. Neither of us want marriage, we've both been burned...badly. We both agree that we could spend every second together for the rest of our lives without needing to be married. Personally I feel like the construct of marriage is a dated ideology that died in the 80's. The only reason to get married anymore is if A.) you are a young couple starting a family that "thinks" you'll be together forever....whippersnappers or B.) You're buying a house together. Which brings me to the legal end of things. Her children are still young, 10 years before the youngest vacates the home, so her moving in with me is unpractical, which is a shame as my home is paid off. Me moving into her home is out for me as her place is big and nice, but her ex-husband was a DIY-idiot and thought he was Bob Villa....he most certainly was not. I have no desire to spend all my free-time and money correcting his idiotic attempt at upscaling the home. We decided that when the time comes, we'll either sell both homes and buy or build new. This brings us full round to legal representation in the event that things go south after. I'm also very reluctant to sell my home, then go in debt with her to buy another. It's like finishing the race and starting over again based on an emotion. Difficult stuff for me to process and come to terms with.
I'm not one to gamble what I've worked my entire life for, in hopes that someone will continue to love me and keep my best interest at heart. Big risk here. Scares the shit out of me, but at the same time; she is damn good to me.
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Yeah, how would the kids work here - I'm confused. If they would move in with you, I see that as a source of strife, the moment they do something to the house you don't like. You are going to be the bad guy. Though its hard, I think maybe the clean slate in 10 years where it is just you both would be easier. But that would be pretty hard to wait perhaps. That's tough - but glad you guys seem to be doing really well again!