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      09-21-2016, 03:17 PM   #1
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Just how weird are your kids?

Our dog stole 36 eggs, and has had tummy trouble for a week. My eldest son apparently loves cleaning, so he helped me out a lot (with the after the aftermath stuff).

So I promised the kid I'd give him a reward. I was thinking something like a spin on a rally course or an ice cream or maybe a half a movie.

"mom let's go to a water cleaning place! Where all sewage and poop goes! I want someone to talk to who explains it all to me!"


So after 3 visits to the vet and one request, I would like to know there are other weird kids out there! Mine is six, and driving me insane.

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      09-21-2016, 03:19 PM   #2
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My dog is my kid. He likes to pee on people.
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      09-21-2016, 03:22 PM   #3
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My dog is my kid. He likes to pee on people.
My dog runs away when she sees a squirrel. She doesn't mind trying to bite a former army dog instructor on my command, but runs away when ever she sees a climbing rat (well with a fluffy tail).

But sure, that counts.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-21-2016, 03:32 PM   #4
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"mom let's go to a water cleaning place! Where all sewage and poop goes! I want someone to talk to who explains it all to me!"
It's your duty to complete the potty training. I still wonder, and even sometimes get the chance to go down into the manholes and see what's up, and what's down.
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      09-21-2016, 03:46 PM   #5
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It's your duty to complete the potty training. I still wonder, and even sometimes get the chance to go down into the manholes and see what's up, and what's down.
Damn, that was it? The most stubborn one of mine was out of diapers at the age of 2 and two months. And ... Yeah, I have a friend of a friend wholl be willing to give the kid a tour, unfortunately.

Hey any new recipes for me? And please, consider me as a newbie, but I'm getting serious creds (and walk-ins at dinner time) because of our epic guacamole which I always credit to you.

"my friend might be a hair moder, but his wife is the shit. Mrs Wade(pronounced weed) is the source of infinite knowledge on this stuff! All hail mr hair!"
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-22-2016, 03:55 AM   #6
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My son wants a special advertised popsicle when he was 4, thats now 17 years ago
Nevertheless: As we'd already said several times "NO!" he jumps straight outta the stand into that big supermarket ice storage box and screamed inside "I WANT THAT IIIICE...DAMMIIIIT"

His twin-aged sister has had her very brightest moment until that, pulled the slidedoor close and mutes his screaming and had this very evil grinning into her little face...and made some other customer scratching their heads wtf's going on into that ice box...

Guys, we'd really laughing our pants off^^
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      09-22-2016, 04:52 AM   #7
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Originally Posted by Dang3r View Post
My son wants a special advertised popsicle when he was 4, thats now 17 years ago
Nevertheless: As we'd already said several times "NO!" he jumps straight outta the stand into that big supermarket ice storage box and screamed inside "I WANT THAT IIIICE...DAMMIIIIT"

His twin-aged sister has had her very brightest moment until that, pulled the slidedoor close and mutes his screaming and had this very evil grinning into her little face...and made some other customer scratching their heads wtf's going on into that ice box...

Guys, we'd really laughing our pants off^^
Lol that's a great sister, I wish I had thought of that one too.

We missed a day of preschool today to visit the water cleaning place. I will not forget the smell for a while.
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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      09-22-2016, 10:31 AM   #8
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Well we've been potty training my son. Was showing him how to pee in the toilet, and he takes his hand and blocks it, getting it on his hand and then all over the place. Maybe that's not weird, not sure.
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      09-22-2016, 10:42 AM   #9
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Lol that's a great sister, I wish I had thought of that one too.

We missed a day of preschool today to visit the water cleaning place. I will not forget the smell for a while.
But, I'm guessing he actually learned a fair bit...potentially even more than what he missed at school.

Smell is something else though isn't it? I've had to be in those places when I worked R&G for a military base...sucked each time I had to even go near.
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      09-22-2016, 10:43 AM   #10
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Well we've been potty training my son. Was showing him how to pee in the toilet, and he takes his hand and blocks it, getting it on his hand and then all over the place. Maybe that's not weird, not sure.
Again, finish the potty training, and teach him IF he pees on hand, must wash afterwards.
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      09-22-2016, 10:44 AM   #11
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Again, finish the potty training, and teach him IF he pees on hand, must wash afterwards, unless in the presence of a 3/4-nude homeless man.
FTFY
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      09-22-2016, 10:47 AM   #12
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On topic in the off topic, yeah, my kid is weird. But in funny ways.

He doesn't have any siblings (only 2yrs right now), but I'm positive he thinks our dog is his older brother because he tries to emulate him.

Literally, he'll get down on all fours and pick up the dog's bone with his teeth or do the same to drink out of the dog's water dish. Or he'll jump when the dog does. I feel sorry for him...he already has me as a father so that's strike one, but now with this, I feel like he's going to need some real psychological help when he's older.

The only upside is he's got an amazing mother, so maybe he'll get to avoid the psychologist...time will tell.
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      09-22-2016, 11:06 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
On topic in the off topic, yeah, my kid is weird. But in funny ways.

He doesn't have any siblings (only 2yrs right now), but I'm positive he thinks our dog is his older brother because he tries to emulate him.

Literally, he'll get down on all fours and pick up the dog's bone with his teeth or do the same to drink out of the dog's water dish. Or he'll jump when the dog does. I feel sorry for him...he already has me as a father so that's strike one, but now with this, I feel like he's going to need some real psychological help when he's older.

The only upside is he's got an amazing mother, so maybe he'll get to avoid the psychologist...time will tell.
I like most dogs more than I like most people, so maybe this isn't all bad.
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      09-22-2016, 12:07 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by Lups View Post
Our dog stole 36 eggs, and has had tummy trouble for a week. My eldest son apparently loves cleaning, so he helped me out a lot (with the after the aftermath stuff).

So I promised the kid I'd give him a reward. I was thinking something like a spin on a rally course or an ice cream or maybe a half a movie.

"mom let's go to a water cleaning place! Where all sewage and poop goes! I want someone to talk to who explains it all to me!"


So after 3 visits to the vet and one request, I would like to know there are other weird kids out there! Mine is six, and driving me insane.


Wait, aren't kids supposed to be a product of their environment?
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      09-22-2016, 12:08 PM   #15
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My dog hates people with hats on. Wear a hat and she'll keep barking at you. Take it off and you're her best friend.
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      09-22-2016, 12:22 PM   #16
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My dog hates people with hats on. Wear a hat and she'll keep barking at you. Take it off and you're her best friend.
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      09-22-2016, 12:32 PM   #17
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You pervert.
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      09-22-2016, 12:36 PM   #18
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You pervert.
I prefer "Scumbag".
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      09-22-2016, 12:47 PM   #19
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I prefer "Scumbag".
Why not both?
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      09-22-2016, 12:58 PM   #20
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Love reading posts like this as I get to read how weird kids can be... wife is prego now and our baby boy is due beginning of march 2017. Can't wait to see what kind of trouble my son and I get into. Mommy isn't gonna be happy

As you can see... he's already in race car driver shifting position

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      09-22-2016, 01:06 PM   #21
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Originally Posted by e46m3lol View Post
Love reading posts like this as I get to read how weird kids can be... wife is prego now and our baby boy is due beginning of march 2017. Can't wait to see what kind of trouble my son and I get into. Mommy isn't gonna be happy

As you can see... he's already in race car driver shifting position


Congrats!!

its awesome! my lil boy turns 1 month tomorrow...
he moves so much as if he shifting gears
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      09-22-2016, 01:17 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
On topic in the off topic, yeah, my kid is weird. But in funny ways.

He doesn't have any siblings (only 2yrs right now), but I'm positive he thinks our dog is his older brother because he tries to emulate him.

Literally, he'll get down on all fours and pick up the dog's bone with his teeth or do the same to drink out of the dog's water dish. Or he'll jump when the dog does. I feel sorry for him...he already has me as a father so that's strike one, but now with this, I feel like he's going to need some real psychological help when he's older.

The only upside is he's got an amazing mother, so maybe he'll get to avoid the psychologist...time will tell.
Haha, those are the best company a kid can have for sure but for the love of clean floors: Hide your eggs!

My son got this book a few months ago that explains how things work (electricity, fridge, sewage system... You name it!) and now he is obsessed with the book. I'm really happy he loves to learn but anyone will give in after shoveling shit for days to anything. I always try to answer their questions as well as I can but this is was a shitty trip!



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Originally Posted by e46m3lol View Post
Love reading posts like this as I get to read how weird kids can be... wife is prego now and our baby boy is due beginning of march 2017. Can't wait to see what kind of trouble my son and I get into. Mommy isn't gonna be happy

As you can see... he's already in race car driver shifting position

Congrats. There is nothing better than the optimism of a future parent.

Just remember the cute days when they do something unbelievably stupid and dream of their 18th birthday when things are really rough.

And hide all eggs.
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Wait, aren't kids supposed to be a product of their environment?
Fuck off. This ain't my fault man!
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You're still a little new here, so I'll let you in on a little secret. Whenever Lups types gibberish, this is an opportunity for you to imagine it to be whatever you'd like it to be.
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How would you know this? Did mommy catch you jerking off to some Big Foot porn ?
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