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      08-06-2013, 08:04 PM   #89
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dtwyim View Post
^Need pics.



^No pics.
Be careful what you wish for. 99% of us who have the balls to say what we have, 100% of the time deliver. "For curiosity of the simple minded is the thought of that of which those wish to have".
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      08-06-2013, 09:00 PM   #90
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dtwyim View Post
^Need pics.
yeah, you're waaaay to late to this game.

you missed that bus long ago....

post in OT more often and you'll catch a pic or two.....or 6...
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      08-07-2013, 01:09 PM   #91
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Some kid put me on his moron list today. FML.
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      08-07-2013, 01:25 PM   #92
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ok, i wasn't gonna post this, but i feel i need to come clean.

1) woke up this morning.
2) took shit. felt good, bro.
3) took shower
4) got dressed
5) went to work
6) had to shit again
7) why is my body fucking with me today !?!? FML

p.s.
i've shat 3 times today - #rumblyinmytumbly
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      08-07-2013, 01:42 PM   #93
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^That's your bowels telling you "I can't deal with this shit anymore.."
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      08-07-2013, 01:58 PM   #94
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yeah, i need some Pepto or something.

i'm getting those goose bump shits....
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      08-07-2013, 05:01 PM   #95
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Litos View Post
yeah, you're waaaay to late to this game.

you missed that bus long ago....

post in OT more often and you'll catch a pic or two.....or 6...
Ha, I have seen her posing beside the Challenger amongst others. Would love to see one about the kitchen
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      08-07-2013, 07:04 PM   #96
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dtwyim View Post
Ha, I have seen her posing beside the Challenger amongst others. Would love to see one about the kitchen
there's one of her in a thong on the couch.
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      08-07-2013, 10:18 PM   #97
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there's one of her in a thong on the couch.
one of my all time favorites....
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      08-07-2013, 10:22 PM   #98
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dtwyim View Post
Ha, I have seen her posing beside the Challenger amongst others. Would love to see one about the kitchen
you wouldn't even believe me if I told you, but she cooks in her panties 95% of the time.....

and I had a picture, but I "think" I deleted it...

lemme check, but don't hold your breath....
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      08-08-2013, 08:48 AM   #99
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Was driving to work this morning, drove through a small ritzy town at the posted 20mph speed limit. Out of the corner of my eye I notice a 6ft 400lb man walking on the sidewalk. What was he wearing? A very nice pair of blue dress slacks, a long red neck tie, no shirt, and a briefcase in his left hand.

After seeing this man, I realized just how dull my life really is...

FMBL.
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      08-08-2013, 09:03 AM   #100
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stopped by Burger King to get me a Large Vanilla Iced Coffee and two sausage and cheese muffins.

walked into work and forgot that a vendor was supposed to be bringing me breakfast (Chick-Fil-A).

tried to give my unopened muffins away to some coworkers - nobody wanted them.

sat at my desk and ate them like a fatty - FML, ya'll !?!?

just got a text - Chick-Fil-A is here..........
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      08-08-2013, 09:05 AM   #101
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Litos View Post
stopped by Burger King to get me a Large Vanilla Iced Coffee and two sausage and cheese muffins.

walked into work and forgot that a vendor was supposed to be bringing me breakfast (Chick-Fil-A).

tried to give my unopened muffins away to some coworkers - nobody wanted them.

sat at my desk and ate them like a fatty - FML, ya'll !?!?

just got a text - Chick-Fil-A is here..........
And this is how those explosive shits you were talking about happen.
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      08-08-2013, 09:08 AM   #102
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Quote:
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And this is how those explosive shits you were talking about happen.
Bingo.
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      08-08-2013, 10:00 AM   #103
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MidwestGolfBum View Post
And this is how those explosive shits you were talking about happen.
the explosive shits happened without eating anything.

probably what i ate the night before......







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      08-08-2013, 10:31 AM   #104
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Tried to play poker with my wife last night, she didn't want to so I got out of bed, went downstairs and watched TV. FML.
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      08-08-2013, 11:27 AM   #105
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Just got done eating lunch and was getting ready to take my 5th break today and realized I had to go #2. Pushing the limits, I realized it was not going to be pleasant. Now I don't know how to handle the situation. Looks like I'll have to go home early. FML.
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      08-08-2013, 12:01 PM   #106
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2011 BMW M3  [10.00]
Sat through two days of training on how to notify/assist the spouse or family member of a Soldier that their loved one died.

Depressing as hell...

Won't say FML though, because I could be the one getting notified...
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      08-08-2013, 01:35 PM   #107
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Albondigas is good, and more of a semi-regular meal around here. I'd like to add a lot more veggies than the wife, but I won't complain much.

I'm still a white posole kind of guy, that's my birthday meal usually. Although a few removed relatives (remember, I married Mex, so they are ALL related to me now) are converting me to the red version.
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      08-09-2013, 04:26 PM   #108
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Quote:
Originally Posted by upstatedoc View Post
Tried to play poker with my wife last night, she didn't want to so I got out of bed, went downstairs and watched TV. FML.
Is that slang for something or you really mean cards?
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      08-09-2013, 09:44 PM   #109
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Jacked off and busted a powerful nut and now this bad chica wants to come over and "just chill" tonight. Not sure if I'm gonna be able to get it up. FML
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      08-09-2013, 09:53 PM   #110
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FwdFtl View Post
Jacked off and busted a powerful nut and now this bad chica wants to come over and "just chill" tonight. Not sure if I'm gonna be able to get it up. FML
wear a condom dude.

or go piss 10 times before you fuck her.

there is still a ton of sperm in your tract which WILL impregnate that bitch....

/litos' life lessons
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